darren

2009-02-15T01:35:00.002+08:00

life sucks. that makes me wanna return to this old blog with old memories and things i wanna let out of my system.

i guess i've not been sensitive enough in my entire life, though the fact that it took me so long to realise that it was a fault of no one but my own that drove me to feel so, ARGH.

these two incidents drove me to feel this way:

1. in camp, i just suan-ed mun kidd that he sang out of tune and kinda got him to feel very down. i mean, it was a joke and even he was laughing, but i guess i shldn't bring ppl dwn this way. i felt horrible when i found out it sank into his system a few minutes later, and tho he said it wasn't any fault of mine, it was. i felt so grossed out at myself, and it came to my realisation that sometimes, i say things that i felt were funny, but were indeed harsh and horrid. the tongue is an important tool, i shld learn to control it. haiz.

2. when yw said he didn't trust me with secrets. i guessed i've not been trustworthy, and i agreed with him. i've never been a man who can keep secrets, though my problem's improved slightly. sometimes i can be successful, but sometimes i treat it as a joke and release them, and it all seemed funny to me, but not to them. i should honestly, learn to SHUT THE HELL UP.

darrenleejunwen, IT IS TIME TO CHANGE. AND FAST.

2008-10-26T21:30:00.000+08:00

maybe someday we'll know.

2008-10-02T23:38:00.002+08:00

everyday's been a whirl. i can't even get grip of my life, as life just flies by so fast. and guess what? it's slightly more than a month before the start of A's.

ARGH. HOW?!

every night, as i walk home in the stillness, after the bustle of the day has subdued and ended, i sing this song. and it's really a song that's so amazing. it just touches my heart, that i know that as i cry out to God, He is there.

and as i think of you, i really can't get to grips with the fact that you're not mine. but i know that i should not and will not fight with God for you. and if you're meant for me, you will. if not, God has someone better. (:

but i guess, i still think and care about you. but God is in control. yeap. (:

Everything that was
Is in Your hands
And all that is to come
I give to You
Take control
This life belongs to You
Forgive me Lord
For walking my own road
Take control
Jesus take control
Your kingdom come
Your will be done
Now and forever

And I surrender
I surrender
I surrender
To You
To You
That I may hear Your voice
That I may know Your heart
That I would see Your world
Through the eyes of hope
This my prayer oh God
This my prayer.

let's fight the battle of A's tgt, everyone. (:

2008-09-09T23:44:00.002+08:00

this week has been an eventful one already.

crap. HAHA.

monday morning, 7am, when i got off the bus, i felt my pocket, and was like "OH DAMN WHERE'S MY PHONE?!" Wei Bin thought i was joking, and he was staring at me like i just cracked the lousiest joke ever. terminated my line, went to school feeling sucky. got my gp results, which kinda sucks. physics was next, another bad U.

argh. maths, disappointing maths.

i need to buck up, ALOT. thank God i did like 4 topics of maths during the hols, cos mrs lim asked me what i did during the hols and she was plesently surprised i did so much. HAHA.

God, help me.

Always be my Baby
We were as one babe
For a moment in time
And it seemed everlasting
That you would always be mine

Now you want to be free
So I'm letting you fly
Cause I know in my heart babe
Our love will never die
No!

You'll always be a part of me
I'm a part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

I ain't gonna cry no
And I won't beg you to stay
If you're determined to leave girl
I will not stand in your way
But inevitably you'll be back again
Cause ya know in your heart babe
Our love will never end no

You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

I know that you'll be back girl
When your days and your nights get a little bit colder oooohhh
I know that, you'll be right back, babe
Ooooh! baby believe me it's only a matter of time

You'll always be apart of me
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my my baby....

You'll always be apart of me (you will always be)
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on (we will linger on....)
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

2008-08-24T21:52:00.002+08:00

OHMAN! olympics is overrrrr...

sucks. DAMN IT.

HAHA. daddy just got himself an iphone. LOLS.

he's been waiting since who knw's when. damn cute la. dad made mom promise she won't nag at having to pay so much for the plan. HAHA. bet she'll nag when the first bill comes in. LOLS.

and.. I HATE EXAMS. HATE HATE HATE HATE. i left three more papers. but the mood is kinda demoralised cos is like, physics and maths = DIE.

sian. and H1 chem aint my strength, not even close.

relying on You, Lord, to put my life into completion.

i want you to say, "well done, good and faithful servant." and until you have said that, i will follow You all the days of my life.

no longer lukewarm will i be. no more a conformist. i don't wanna be spit out of Your mouth. heh.

one more month to new phone. ENDURE.

2008-08-11T22:56:00.002+08:00

so we will run
altogether with our hearts aflamed
with a fire that can't be tamed our God,
all glory to Your name
we will run
i surrender to bring you fame
i desire that You be praised
our God,
all glory to Your name, JESUS!

=DDD
amen. great is Your name

i love Jesus. more than anything else ever. how he turned sunday's service from dull to joy! HAHA. i thank You Lord, for giving me the gifts that i now possess, and i pray that You will guide me to use them to Your glory, so i may be answerable to You.

HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY CLR! =DDD

it's been like 8 yrs since i've come to know you. MAN. so long ago. HAHA.

to think the number of people who came to Christ cos we prayed. =D thank You Lord. HAHA.

- i miss you, and i promise to be there for you, even if you choose not to share anything with me. (:

NIGHTS!

2008-08-03T00:17:00.002+08:00

life is full of regrets. like how i feel now.

regret, regret, REGRET.

great-granny, i'll miss you dearly. it's a pity that i may nvr see you again. ever.

this kinda spoils a great day for me.

FOP!

woot. God touched, touched, touched. it was.. kinda amazing. to think it was soooo impromptu, and i kinda looked dumb la, in berms and all. HAHA. wells, bt the message, to the songs, to everything. it was like.. GOD.

i realise, God does things in miraculous ways. he just taught me a lesson three nights back, and today, yet another. Rev Mark was right. we have no control of other things. we are responsible to our loved ones, but responsible for ourselves. and yeap, the analogy was perfect. i need to start a customs unit in my brain. heh.

jesus, You will be my FOREVER. on that day, when i walked dwn into the sea, into my rebirth and renewed life, i made that promise as i sang that song; i have decided to follow jesus.

forever.

2008-07-21T22:11:00.003+08:00

ohman.
i'm sick again. i hate being sick.

siansiansian.
my nose is super clogged, my throat is super hoarse, and i am drowsy from the medicine.

at least i get to stay home and rest. HAHA.

jie's off to china/hk tmrw for school trip. super fun sia, and it's free. LOLS.
dad's in KL alr. so after tmrw, it's just me and mom again. HAHA.

enjoy yr trip sis!

yesterday was church anniversary! happy happy 32nd birthday Maranatha Christian Assembly!
i love you! thank you Jesus for sustaining us and helping us throughout these years.

I LOVE THEE!

i can only imagine - MercyMe

I can only imagine what it will be like 
When I walk by your side 
I can only imagine what my eyes will see 
When your face is before me 
I can only imagine 
I can only imagine 

Surrounded by your glory 
What will my heart feel? 
Will I dance for you Jesus, 
Or in awe of you be still? 
Will I stand in your presence, 
Or to my knees will I fall? 
Will I sing Halelluja, 
Will I be able to speak at all? 
I can only imagine 
I can only imagine 

I can only imagine when that day comes 
And I find myself standing in the Son 
I can only imagine when all I will do 
Is forever, forever worship you 
I can only imagine 
I can only imagine 

Surrounded by your glory, 
What will my heart feel? 
Will I dance for you Jesus, 
Or in awe of you be still? 
Will I stand in your presence, 
Or to my knees will I fall? 
Will I sing Halelluja, 
Will I be able to speak at all? 
I can only imagine, yeah 
I can only imagine 
I can only imagine, yeah, yeah, yeah 

Surrounded by your glory, 
What will my heart feel? 
Will I dance for you Jesus, 
Or in awe of you be still? 
Will I stand in your presence, 
Or to my knees will I fall? 
Will I sing Halelluja, 
Will I be able to speak at all? 
I can only imagine, yeah 

I can only imagine, yeah, yeah 
I can only imagine, Yeah 
I can only imagine 
I can only imagine, Ohh yeah 
I can only imagine 

I can only imagine when all I will do 
is forever, forever worship you 
I can only imagine

2008-07-17T23:29:00.001+08:00

i will not give up.

i have decided that i don't wanna let you go.

2008-07-10T22:19:00.002+08:00

to be honest, i've lived a life of easy contentment. i guess Singaporean men are all rather boring, without much ambition in life, besides living a simple life.

i'm jus like most ordinary, simple and boring Singaporean men. i've always wished to study hard, do well in school, make it to uni, get a stable and good job, meet and marry my first love, have beautiful children, and die a happy man. (although dying jus leads me on to another life ahead with JESUS!)

to be honest, i've never really wanted anything more, anything less. i guess anything more would be very very very amazing, but besides that, nah. HAHA.

i've been trying to let go, but really, it's kinda hard. to think God answered me a yes. there's so many many times He told me that you're the one. just a month ago, the reply was yes again. i feel so dumb, cos no matter how many times i promised you i will nvr break yr conviction and wanna wait for you, i guess i'm just unconvincing. i never wanted to pressure you. to me, if the time comes and there's still smth, then the wait is worthwhile. but if not, then it's just too bad. but i guess you rather end it all. which kinda like... SUCKS.

i just want you to lean on me when you need someone. i just wanted to be there for you thru the hard and the wonderful times. but guess i'm not needed or wanted. to think i was even compared to zhixian. DAMNIT. like i was that bad. DAMNNNNNN.

i hope you'll give me a chance to show you how much i care and love you, but i rather you forget me than hate me.

2008-07-01T22:14:00.002+08:00

you still send chills down my spine, still makes me shy.
i want you, and i'm not desperate.
i just hope that you'll know it's alright to dream of being with me someday
and share this dream with me.

2008-06-25T22:28:00.003+08:00

been feeling rather down lately. bad results really gave me a shaking up. i feel so tired inside, like even as i tried so hard for econs, i didn't score well. damn.

i have this BIG problem. ie i always do slippy-sloppy work. HAHA. and that's a big problem, cos when i'm supposed to be precise, esp since i take science, i.. don't. i settle for the average, never trying to write till it's super clear. heh. i really need to change that.

been sick too. the whole week, since the day before school started. woah. and today especially. migraine plus flu. heh. i feel super shagged and damn blur. honest. i realised that i kept looking at people and turning away before i realise who that person was! heh. it kept happening the whole week, but today, with the migraine, it got worse.

I'M NOT EMO-ING! I JUST AM TOOOOOO TIRED! =(

so... SORRRRRRRYYYYYY if i did it to you! i didn't mean it. the worse thing is that whenever i try to turn back again and smile, most of the time the person is already looking away. ARGH. that... sucks!

i'm sorry i've been avoiding you. i just dunno what to say, cos you mean so much to me. heh. i'll try to say hi the next time k? i promise. and i'll still be waiting... for YOU.

2008-06-24T23:08:00.011+08:00

My Wish - Rascal Flatts

I hope the days come easy
And the moments pass slow
And each road leads you
Where you want to go
And if you're faced with the choice
And you have to choose
I hope you choose the one
That means the most to you
And if one door opens to another door closed
I hope you keep on walkin' til you find the window
If it's cold outside, show the
world the warmth of your smile
But more than anything,
More than anything

My wish for you
Is that this life becomes all that
You want it to
Your dreams stay big, your worries stay small
You never need to carry more than you can hold
And while you're out there gettin'
Where you're gettin' to
I hope you know somebody loves you
And wants the same things too
Yeah, this is my wish

I hope you never look back but you never forget
All the ones who love you
And the place you left
I hope you always forgive
And you never regret
And you help somebody every chance you get
Oh, you find God's grace in every mistake
And always give more than you take
But more than anything,
Yea more than anything

This is my wish
I hope you know somebody loves you
May all your dreams stay big

i really hope you did well this mid-years. i did pathetic. heh.

when will be the day that i get a second chance to make it right? i really wanna, but it's hard when you don't.

2008-06-20T20:38:00.001+08:00

ouch.

deleted huh.

damn.

and there i go, shattered into a million pieces. again.

2008-06-20T00:49:00.002+08:00

i guess that in life, you can't determine everything in it. it is not easy, and not as straight as you want it to be. you just got to learn to let go, and let God work out His perfect plan for your life. it took me a long time to trust God, and though sometimes it's hardest, especially in times of total doubt or a cloudy and bleak future ahead of you, but everything happens for a reason, and it is not mere coincidence that anything at all occurred.

i guess that by living your life as a living sacrifice to God, and focusing on Him is when you will get your reward. and that's why pastor preached about praying for your preferable future, and God will honour it if you're faithful and trust in Him for everything.

lastly, i just want you to know that i really do love you and want you to be a part of my future, and that i really did want you to honour your conviction with God. i still do, and i will do what i say i will. i'm always here.

2008-06-16T00:23:00.002+08:00

hello hello.

had a tremendously crazy week and i'm feeling real tired now. HAHA.
came back from camp, slept at 2 plus. woke at 8 to go to jerrold's hse for tennis and fellowship. came home and swam with yw and jakeh, before heading dwn to AMK to play basketball and eat supper. cabbed home and slpt.

sat woke in morning, tuition, church, heartware bbq. left ard 12 plus and cabbed home at one. slpt.

woke on sunday, went to church, went coffee bean with jon and jakeh, went soccer at althea's place, dinner at Upp Paya Lebar with wilson, timothy and jakeh, home, update blog. HAHA.

while walking home, i asked God why. i know He has reassured me, but i just realised that i've been trying very hard with my own strength and not letting God work in His time. i guess i've made a mistake. sorry. but the Lord doesn't fail, and i know for sure that His plans for my life is a perfect will. amen.

2008-06-13T23:50:00.001+08:00

whatever.

tired.

2008-06-13T01:03:00.002+08:00

back!

hahaha. (:

learnt alot this camp. the speaker was so amazing, honestly, that i have actually learnt so much this camp. theme this year was "dream partnership", and Ps John Lewis touched on alot of topics that just might, or should i say, be life-changing for me. He touched on how everyone is qualified to be a minister and about our preferable future in our life, on the Moses Generation, Tarraso - to stir up, pentacostal theology and lastly, the FAT (Faithful, Attitude, Teachable) leaders. HAHA.

honestly, i learnt alot during this camp than any other. the few things that the pastor touched on that spurred me on included having desperation for the loss, and that vision is seeing the invisible. WOW. honestly, although he went very deeply into studying the text and also used rather profound terms and phrases, i learnt more than ever before. the amount of notes i took was amazing, but i still feel so hungry for more. even as the sermon lasted more than 2 hours in one of the sessions, i didnt want it to end.

Ps John didn't really do much altar calls compared to other camps that had one every service. he did it only twice, and i went once, but i had the blessing of having so many mighty men of God present. Ps Sunny from Penang, a close friend of my dad and i, also came down with his wife. when my family went for prayer, i just felt a sudden urge of tears coming down my face when Ps John was praying for sis. when it came to me, i just CRIED. i was crying like a baby, to be honest, and i've never cried like that since the 2002 youth camp.

my prophesy included becoming a worship leader someday, and that i am my own, that my dad doesn't make me, me. heh. the funny thing was that i had been suffering from this fear and also pressure of being the senior pastor's son. i mean, you might think, DUH, you'll feel pressure, but i didn't think i had that, until when pastor prayed over me. guess what was the most scary thing? i was being approached a number of times to enter the singing ministry and twice in this camp by both Jason and Jolene. and jason approached me just before i went up for prayer and i tried giving excuses. HAHA. God knows how to kick me into action. heh.

pray for me if you can, people, for humility, that i may forever stay humble and thank God for the gifts in which he provided me. this can be applied to what i learned in this camp, that fruitfulness is not a substitute of faithfulness. i want to be fruitful, not just faithful. and i need all the help i can get. thanks. ((:

2008-06-08T18:57:00.001+08:00

church camp.
8th to 12 june
cameron highlands
hotel equatorial
-off!

(pray for me for journey mercies, and that God will touch me in a very special way. i will miss all of you here, but fret not, i'll be home in no time..!)

2008-06-07T00:48:00.002+08:00

Oh Lord my God, when I in awesome wonder
Consider all the works Thy hands hath made
I see the stars, I hear the roaring thunder
Thy power throughout the universe displayed

Then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee
How great Thou art, how great Thou art
then sings my soul, my saviour God to thee
How great Thou art, how great Thou art

And when i think, that God his Son not sparing
Sent Him to die, i scarce can take it in
That on that cross, my burden gladly bearing
He bled and died to take away my sin

when Christ shall come with shouts of acclamation
And take me home where joy shall fill my heart
Then I shall bow in humble adoration
and there proclaim, my God, how great Thou art

certainly, how great Thou art.. Lord, when i think abt the way you changed and moulded me, and shaped me into who you want me to be, i thank You, oh Lord, although i'm certainly not perfect, OH PLEASE NOT EVEN CLOSE, bt Lord, i wouldnt have wanted it another way. this song, oh Lord, is the perfect description of what You've done in three stanzas, one chorus. HAHA. but Lord, what You have done to many is certainly more than that.. HAHA.

tho there have been many things where i don't agree or had wished for it another way, but Lord You certainly proved me wrong in life, time and time again. and that's when i've learnt to trust you. in more ways than one, though i do doubt sometimes, but i'm glad of the way you've reassured me time and time again, even though by now i shld be mature enough to trust you wholly.

Lord, let whatever you wanna do in my life change me, oh Lord, and shape my life out the way you want it. decrease me, so that You may increase Yourself in my heart. thankyou Daddy. (: for everything.

2008-06-03T18:10:00.003+08:00

went family dinner last night. was celebrating dad's bday, which was abit more than a week ago.. ate at a chinese restaurant in shenton way. the food was great, yeap. HAHA.

on the way home, we passed the kallang area, and saw this group of small malay boys cheering and shouting and waving while their truck passed us. they had opened the door and did their performance to those waiting at the traffic light. i thought singapore did well, either drew or won their opponents, but realised when i reached home that we lost real bad.

all the talk of world cup 2010 huh. dreammmm.

heh, bt.. dreams come true. HAHA.

my dream is that tonight, i will be the happiest man on earth, hearing your voice over at the other end of the receiver. heh.

but that's my wish. a dream. a fantasy.

trust me on this one, but you really really must.

cos you mean so much, much more..

i.. miss.. you.

reflections..

2008-05-31T21:23:00.002+08:00

was walking home from joo chiat after dinner. had fei fei wanton mee with the youth, then cos of the fact that i hate to squeeze in the van and having to have the responsibility to be a student and return home to make my mother happy instead of heading to bugis tcc with some of the dudes, went home myself. walked thru the "dirty" side of joo chiat, haig road, a popular hangout among the malay community (i'm not being racist btw) and then headed home past paya lebar mrt. was a route filled with people, cos i guess it's saturday night. HAHA.

reflected on the way home, and talked to Daddy. had a round of jokes with Him, and laughed to myself. heh, somehow ppl who were looking at me may have thought i was mad, bt wells, who says you can't get crazy over Jesus? hehehe.

walked home, and listened to my ipod. "Hold On" by 33 Miles was on repeat as i really loved the song. i can really relate to it, but wells, i'll have to wait for a one-day where i might just get a chance to live it out.

Hold On - 33 Miles (beautiful lyrics)
i've been there a thousand times
i felt the rain like a thousand knives
and it hurts,
i know it hurts.
i've been there like a fighter plane
try to fly my way through a hurricane
and it's hard,
i know it's hard.

don't be afraid
you'll make it thru
just call out to me
and i'll come running to you

and hold on, hold on,
when the current pulls you under,
and your heart beats like thunder,
just give me your hand and hold on hold on
until the storm is over
and i'll be fighting for you
just give me your hand
and hold on.

i'll give you hope,
i'll give you faith,
and if its dark i'll light the way for you, for you.
by your side until the end,
until you're standing tall again
i'm here, i'll always be here

and if the tide sweeps you out to sea
when your strength is gone and it's hard to believe

just hold on, hold on,
when the current pulls you under,
and your heart beats like thunder,
just give me your hand and hold on hold on
until the storm is over
and i'll be fighting for you
just give me your hand
and hold on.

beautiful aint it? HAHA. i loved every minute of it. beautifulllllllll. just like you.

2008-05-26T20:51:00.002+08:00

whooo.

had an amazing sunday at church. met pastor bob stevenson after more than or around 10 yrs! HAHAHA. he still remembered me, and recognised me, tho he wasn't too sure. as you can see, i think i look abit different since around 10 yrs ago, i guess.. HAHAHA.

hmmmm, i really felt i could relate to his message, and was truly touched by someone who is like a father figure to me, tho we nvr really met. HAHA. he's very close to my dad, and sent me stamps when i was young.

heh, i asked God about something and told Him that if i went down and pastor bob recognised me and gave me a hug, then it's God's will. i even shaked his hand to try to "avoid" a hug, but after that he was like, "oh look at you. so handsome and big and tall already." and then pulled me over for a hug. HAHAHAHA. so funny. heh.

wells, all the best everyone for the next week plus! jiayou! =D

to all history students: all the best for tomorrow.
maths: all the best too.
HAHA. maths = everyone. H1 or H2 all included. HAHA. too bad. LOLS.

darren, out!

2008-05-22T23:03:00.002+08:00

there's something amazing about You, oh Lord.

it's unconceivable, and i'm captured at the awe of You.
how awesome are You, oh King.
Your splendor so mighty and powerful, yet so soft and tender.

i feel like a child again, cos into Your hands i wanna run daily.
teach me oh Lord.

thanks Daddy for helping me know. HAHAHA. ohmy, hw ironic it is, eh? HAHA.

2008-05-18T22:00:00.004+08:00

yawns. i feel damn tired alr.
HAHA.

spent friday night and early saturday morning in geylang central macs with bryan. deborah, damien and chih chuan also came along. HAHA.
studied, but wasnt the most productive of sessions as i was really tired. gave up at 5 plus and came home with bryan. HAHA.

slept till 1 in the afternoon. didnt go youth but joined them for dinner at bugis. HAHA. wasted an hour at arcade watching the younger ones playing the jap drums game. came home, studied awhile then went off to bed.

sunday was church! hahahas. found out SIS STEPHANIE IS PREGNANT! sis steph and bro keith have always loved kids and been waiting for one since they got married around 4 to 5 yrs ago? HAHA. YES! thank God they finally are blessed with one.

testimony of them:
bro keith has always been a mentor to me ever since i started serving in the main service. He, being the worship coordinator, guided me and slowly induced me into the team. He has always served as a encouragement and blessing to my life and i thank God, honestly, for this great man. i've never seen someone who can play the piano and worship God with such greatness, and being so humble a man that he is. if you're looking for someone to follow, KEITH is the one. HAHA. (:

sis stephanie has always been the one i acknowledge from before till forever. i will never forget her wonderful stories shared to me in sunday school. i can still remember, on the day where jeriel and i baptised together, how much thanks we gave to her in our testimonies. HAHAHA! shes always so sweet, understanding and patient with a very silly and trouble-making boy. THANKYOU! (:

thank God for them. the only sad thing is... they can't join us for church camp! argh. HAHA.

but still, yeah! gnna have more babies in church (alr so MANY!)

evan came today. he refused to let me carry him or kiss him cos i didnt attend his bday party. HAHAHA. he's only two yrs old and he remembered! HAHA. so sweet lah, bt really, college day LAH, no choice. HAHA.

Pastor Kelvin preached today about fruitfulness, and at the end, we did a prophetic act of getting fresh water from dropping salt into it. i asked God for NINE things. HAHAHA. sorry lah, long list. heh. and i really wanna have an abundance this yr. prayers included daddy and YES, sister too. HAHA. sabrina, you're right. tho i pretend not to care, i do lah. HAHA.

pretty pretty pleaseeeee, pray for shermaine, my sis. she's in philippines and there's warnings of earthquakes. SHUCKS. haiz.
-worries

went lunching with youth before prayer meeting. then briefing for church camp 2008! im excited! ARE YOU? 8th to 12 june 2008. see you there.

the end.

i miss you, but i don't wanna pressure you. heh. but i care alot, and i hope you'll give me a chance someday, when you've fulfilled your promise.
patiently i'll wait.

2008-05-15T23:06:00.002+08:00

Lord i offer my life to You
Everything that i've been through
Use it for Your glory
Lord i offer my days to You
Lifting my praise to You
As a pleasing sacrifice
Lord i offer You my life

Had a chat at dinner with leslie just now, and as i was walking home, i took my time, strolled and just worshipped Him in the quiet and stillness of the night. i told Him everything i felt, how tired i was being in a jc and everything, and i asked Him for strength.

I also took time to reflect on the many instances where He actually stood by me and helped me thru, and also gave me the talents that i possessed. He reminded me that i should use my talents wisely and also effectively.

i was reminded as well that we are certainly living in the last days. and Jesus is gnna come back soon. so when are we gonna start taking action? HAHA. (:

NOWWWWWWWWW!

=DDDD

So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you

elliot yamin - wait for you.

2008-05-10T23:37:00.003+08:00

life in itself holds no meaning.
it's the love, the friends, the family and God that makes life worth living for.

as in reflect back in life, i realise that God has really been super duper faithful with me, for all the wrong i've done, for all the things that i did even though i knew i was dishonouring him and my parents. yet He has always been here for me.

as i was walking back home from the bus stop jus nw, i took a step back and marveled God's creation. i thanked Him for his immense love over my life, and i just worshipped him in the quiet night. i didnt care who walked past, and that they may be disturbed by my horrid voice, but who cares. as long as God sees my heart, i need not worry. HAHA. =P

church camp 2008 - Cameron Highlands, 8-12 June.

HAHA.

and you arh, hope you feel better already from yr sudden bout of sickness. prayed for you already. heh. hope yre alright.

-as i walk thru life, i hope that i may be the one who holds your hand, to lead you thru life. cos it's the love that makes it all. (:

nights ppl. (((:

2008-05-09T22:07:00.004+08:00

i'm studying at macs now. HAHAHA. boreddddd so i took some pics.
this pac if m&ms suck man. mint. yucks for this one.

macs has a new macflurry. milo. HAHA.

YAWNS. am gnna mug here till super duper ultra late. maybe two to three?

-call me if you see this and aint busy. i need to be entertained. HAHA

2008-05-04T22:59:00.003+08:00

woooooot.
jus timed myself for skill A.
for those who don't take physics, skill A = SPA assessment where you have to plan an entire experiment in 1 hour. HAHAHAHA. gosh. and for the last 3 SPA pracs, i scored 2-3 out of 8. DIE.

plus it's 25% of SPA assessment, and that means 5% of overall phy grade, which determines one grade to another. HAHAHA.

i'm screwed. although i must admit i managed to chiong thru an answer scheme in 40:05 min, with illegible handwriting and without having to think, it's rather slow i think. i need to time myself well tmrw, but it's SOOOOOO early in the morn. HAHA.

oh, went studying with althea after church jus now. we were at coffee bean singpost. met my neighbour who's a junior of althea in MI. HAHAHA. so funny, to see her shock on her face when she saw the two of us. HAHA. surprise surprise. hehheh.

my hand aches now from all that writing. sian.

2008-05-04T20:41:00.001+08:00

final SPA tomorrow.

wish me luck!
pray for me, will ya?

all the best to all, skill A's the toughest, ever. HAHA. ):

GG.

2008-05-02T15:29:00.002+08:00

argh, guess what? another class outing without inviting me. so be it. i'm just not bothered anymore. but wells, i guess i made a choice that i should have made, that is to accept those that are outcasted, and now being one too. ARGH.

heard from classmate you're at town now. wells, i don't even know anything about you anymore. and that sucks.

jie's going philippines tmrw, dad's leaving to canada soon too.

the feeling of lonliness sucks.

2008-04-30T22:43:00.002+08:00

trust me and we'll go far
i'm sure cos you're the one i love
and nothing, nothing will ever stop me from doing so.

and i wanna let you knw that
if you'd trust me one last time
i'll make it right
and all i need is you by my side
sharing moments in life that has laughter and tears.
and with Daddy as our aim in life to please
be strong and continue in life together someday.

i knw you told me to forget the wish you made cos you can't fulfill it. but you know what? there was always no pressure from the start. and all i wanted was a little commitment, to know that there's someone who's willing to be my pillar of strength when the going gets tough. i wanna share your laughter and share your pain. and i wanna smile each morning when i wake and think of you. i promise, if you give me one last chance, that i'll do all i can to make sure we don't cross the line. cos it's not just about me and you, but it's about me and you and DADDY.

this i promise you.

2008-04-27T21:58:00.002+08:00

OHMYGOSH!

i love my mummy so much lah. she's the sweetest! HAHAHA. she just boiled for me barley leh. FOR ME! HAHAHAHA. she's so sweet. GOSH. hahahahahahahas. shucks. i gave her a hug for it lah. i mean, seriously. HAHAHA. damn. to think i just shouted at her about ten minutes ago when she came nagging, again. HAHAHAHAHAHA. tho mummy, you really do need to relax, i still loveeeee YOU even tho you nag. HAHA. tho i'm really too embarassed to say that to her. slap me random someone! PLEASE, may the words 'i loveeee you' come out ASAP. HAHA.

but still, i HUGGED her okay? HAHAHA.

oh, and today i went shopping too. HAHAHA. and ate a bloddy expensive lunch and yam cha. SHUCKS. HAHAHA. we yam cha-ed at tcc, what a place! HAHA. wells, it's always usual for the few of us! HAHA. and guess what? CHEESE WEDGES ROCKS. HAHAHA.

oh, got new sunglasses from topman today. WOOOOOT! HAHA. shucks. guess what? i spent 400 on shopping this month alr. GOD, please help me stop shopping. OHOH, church camp in one and a half months. HAHAHAHA.

oh, and today, we randomly mentioned for all of us guys to save some cash and go tgt to HILLSONG CONFERENCE. hahahahas. scott! REMEMBER OUR DREAM? HAHAHA. it was when we were like, errrrr, pri 6. HAHA. wells, nw we have joel lyn and jonathan too. PLEASE, wenny, yingwen, jeriel and jakeh, we must go tgt toooo! HAHA. MALE BONDING.

oh, jonathan has a new vitamin, VITAMIN K. good for neoprints. HAHAHA. -winks

hmmmmm shucks, guess what? I'M USING SHUCKS NOWADAYS. MR YEW! =(
HAHAHAHA. at least it's better than some random stars that go like this - ****

2008-04-27T18:25:00.003+08:00

Jesus Shall Take the Highest Honour

Jesus shall take the highest honour
Jesus shall take the highest praise
Let all the earth join heaven in exalting
The name that is above all other names
Lets bow our knees in humble adoration
For at His name every knee must bow
Let every tongue confess He is Christ, God's only son
Soverign Lord, we give You glory now

For all honour, and blessing and power
Belongs to You, belongs to You
For all honour, and blessing and power
Belongs to you, belongs to you
Lord Jesus Christ
Son of the living God

for me, there is nothing in this world that can beat the feeling of being able to serve God in the area of music. today, i must say, was probably the best out of all the times i have served Him in a long while. the peace, joy and anoiting that fills you when you are up there serving God is honestly, the best thing that can happen to me. this song really touched me, as well as the other songs.

when we came in for worship practice this morning, i was feeling rather weary, sick and tired. i had a very bad sore throat and just finished ccc camp. johnny, the song leader, was sharing with us the theme in which today's service was all about. usually, there will be a theme such as praise, but today, johnny's was simple, yet amazing. it was this - just for the people to come and enter God's kingdom and worship Him. and i felt it was something that was the BEST. =D

every song really touched me, and i could feel God's love just enter me. he restored in me energy to serve Him with every ounce of strength i had. thankyou Lord Jesus.

the preacher for today was also amazing. the sermon was on the church of Ephesus. The church of Ephesus had lost their first love; Jesus. with all the confusion that occured in my life for the past two months, i realised that the sermon was what God really wanted to speak to me, and i thanked Him for it.

now, let me just talk about the camp.
oh, the ccc camp was also amazing, though i was feeling damn sick, especially on sat. the nostalgia i felt at the end of the camp where the elections was held really took me aback. seriously, the excos and some members in my committee really did bring me alot of joy in the time i've been in sr, and i really really will miss the times we shared. heartware, especially, was the time where we all found out about each other more personally, and i'm sure i've made some lifelong friends in ccc. excos, thank you.

on the last note, HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHARLOTTE. ((:
hope you enjoyed yr birthday and make use of my present, won't you?

and yeap, i seriously dont blame you, neither do i blame God or myself. i knew this would happen, and thanks for the trust you said you had. whether i stop liking you or not, i just want you to know that there was always no pressure on you to be with me, before 21 or after. and everything depended and will always depend on circumstances. whether or not we will ever end up together someday, i wanna let you know that you're the one i love. yeap, and i'm proud of you, SO PROUD. i just hope that one day, Daddy will bring you someone, if it aint me, to be part of your life and be with you thru everything.

i just hope you will continue to shine that lovely smile of yours, cos it is honestly something amazing. you're one heck of a cheerful girl, even if you keep saying youre not. =D true love waits and lasts, and if our love is true, maybe there will be one day. for now, let's focus on our studies and Daddy, yea? =D

2008-04-24T23:08:00.000+08:00

why do i even bother. argh.

stop this coldness. STOP..!

2008-04-22T22:41:00.002+08:00

i loveeeee kids! =D
i think i wanna have a bball or soccer team when i get married.

HAHAHAHA. =P

went granny's on sunday and played with joey. so cute. and i havent seen evan in two weeks. i cant take it no moreeeeee!

HAHAHA.

i am damn tired lah. argh. i need sleeeeeep.
-whines.

it's proven that singaporeans just love to whine but not put money where their mouth is. darren is one of them. i'm just not bothered by it. HAHAHA.

hmmmm kaixiang, its a pity that it takes yr absence for us to realise hw much you brighten our class. tc yeap? HOPE TO SEE YOU SOON! hahaha. =D

God, pls help heal kx so he can be back with us. HAHA.
AMEN.

nothing's gnna change my love for you.

2008-04-20T18:07:00.003+08:00

though i doubt you come here anymore, but i wanna let you know this.

let's work things out, cos it's you i long for.
you are on my mind, day and night.
i dont care what everyone else says, i only care about you.
whatever they wanna say is their business, it's only you that matters.
time was and is nvr a factor.
baby, it's you i love.
and i know you feel it too. (:

let me knw.

2008-04-16T20:47:00.002+08:00

super tired. played lots of bball and rugby today. scrapped my foot.
tired. tired. ultra super duper tired.

feeling like a sucker. cos yet again you misunderstood me. argh.

2008-04-13T18:11:00.002+08:00

LALALALA. had a good day at church. (: spent time with the phillipino group that came, and was their drummer cos they didnt have one. HAHA. made new friends. LOADS! ((((:

i'd rather - luther vandross

i'd rather have bad times with you,
than good times with someone else.
i'd rather be beside you in a storm,
than safe and warm by myself.
i'd rather have hard times together
than to have it easier apart.
i rather have the one who holds my heart.

you made the right decision. heh. (:
it's just a matter of time, and i'll still be here. tc of yourself k? (:
God bless.

with this, i end this post.

2008-04-13T07:49:00.003+08:00

all the wishful thinking from the start.
the optimism, the joy, the plucking up of courage.

i saw it coming. just that i didnt know how fast it hit me.

bham. i lie dwn, gasping for air.

i don't blame you, i hope you know that i don't at all do. and if i could change knowing or falling for you, i wouldn't. cos you brought me so much joy, so much. one day, you said. but that was the past.

2008-04-10T23:19:00.000+08:00

sleepy.

staring at the glass in front of me,
is it half empty?

2008-04-07T23:41:00.002+08:00

argh. IJC = GG.

HAHA. maths, i hate you. fly to the moon and nvr return. rahhh.

hehheh. oh btw, i'm nt emo-ing LAH. HAHAHA. =)

so ppl out there who are curious, i'm nottttt.

i jus felt like writing smth that i wanted to since like a looonnnggg time ago LAH, the waiting for an sms and all thing. HAHA. i finally did it when i took a break from maths.

oh btw, i came out with a new realisation.

darren cannot take breaks. they end up being longer than the time he studied. OOOOOOPS.

whooooooo

2008-04-07T21:14:00.002+08:00

went to cmpb tday. was a stupid waste of my time, completely. argh.
went there, the security was so tight, lockers for camera hps that are real cute and small, scanning of bag. waited in a queue and went to take measurements. got touched by a guy who was real weird, like abit gay la. he touched my waist and said come here it's yr turn. HAHAHA. then waited for my number to be called for abt an hour. found out my medical examination was to be on another day due to some screw up in my signup for ns. then went home.

HAHAHA. stupid complete stupid complete waste of time. bt i saw cmpb once! interesting place lah. heh.

went adam road with daddy, ate nasi lemak! HAHA. ((:
there goes another satisfied customer, darren leeeeeeee.

hehheh.
shall go for my medical exam on 24th april. argh. bt at least can pon school! =P

that's all for today. (:

staring at the blank sheet of white paper,
i hear a sound go off.
i scamper over,
opening the message with utter excitement.
i read, i look, i hope,
but it's someone else, not you.

with disappointment etched across my face,
i put it down,
not bothering to reply.
but it's okay,
i tell myself.
cos i'll wait, wait, wait,
till another day,
where i hope you'll think of me again.

all i wanted was to know you cared, and for you to know how much i do for you. (:

well, when you asked me if i ever thought of my future, my actual reply was "you".

save it for a rainy day, my friend, where the mice scampers back to shelter, but where you can stand alone, and no one can see you cry. but guess what, my dear friend, God is actually crying with you. - this is my analogy of crying in the rain. HAHA. beat that.

i feel like being a lit student for a day. HAHAHA. =P

maybe one day it'll work, and i hope it would, but it all depends on you now. i promise to try my best, but i'm weak. i admit it.

2008-04-05T22:34:00.002+08:00

into Your courts i run with praises flowing from my heart
everyday i wake i sing your song
it's an anthem of my life
i wanna spend my days in Your presence Lord
bowed before Your throne
in the house of God is where i find my peace
is where i find my
home is heaven
one day Lord i will be
in Your courts You'll find me
in worship at Your feet
hide me now
in the shadow of Your wings
is where i will be, is where i will be.

yeap, HOME IS HEAVEN.

hahahahas.
dad's been the greatest so far, shielding me and guiding me and helping me make sure my mother doesn't go overboard. HAHA. mother's really pissed with results, can't blame her cos i did realll badly, and i knw i can do better.

argh. HAHA. i guess i gotta buck up! =(

You make me smile, LORD. yes and you too.

2008-04-04T23:37:00.002+08:00

there are alot of things i do, just cause i wanna see that smile on yr face, and guess what? it makes me smile toooooo!

there are alot of things i say, and i mean every word i say from deep down in my heart.

and, it's because i love you. and that's all that mattered in the first place, and that is what matters now.

and i hope you love me too. (:

all it takes is to see yr smile. i'm in heaven.

i'll do anything for you, cos i really love you. and please dont be pressured. cos good things are worth the wait and yre worth much more than that. (((((: <3!

oh btw, on a side note, happy birthday wh. (: you rock soooo much. hope it aint destroyed by parents night. HAHAHA.

2008-03-30T19:23:00.002+08:00

wooot. eelin gave birth yesterday! 30th March.

hmmmm welcome to the Earth Amelia Poo En Hui. (:
may God bless you all the days of your life, and i promise i will be there to support you and yr brother like johnny did to me! (:
thanks johnny, for your immense support to us thru the difficult times. although family commitments have come in the way of yr service to us recently, you were there when we were in deep shit, and nw i can dare say we've finally found our way thru. REFRRESH! ministry. you've been a great fren to us, and i thank God you were part of my life! and i mean it, seriously. the constant advice, the pillar of strength that you provided will always be remembered. hahahahas. and yes, i loveeee evan!

HAHAHA.
heard eelin started feeling pains at 3am and gave birth as 1233pm. HAHAHA. OHMY! so long. HAHAHA. maybe i will spare my future wife from 4 kids. HAHAHA. OUCHHHH!

ahwells, am tired and still waiting. God bless everyone this week eh?

(:

the post that changes everything.

2008-03-16T18:37:00.002+08:00

"and now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."
1 Corinthians 13:13.

The speaker tday at church touched on love in every aspect. One thing that struck me most is that love is nt what the world seems to portray it, especially what we see in films and television programmes. but love is more than that, and he reminded me of what love should be.

He also made us do a rating for ourselves, to judge ourselves on where we stand, in our relationships with people, parents, spouse, children and our enemies. he talked about random acts of kindness, which is really what we need to keep doing to the people around us, be it the church member, youth leader, pastor, parents, siblings and spouse. or it could even be to people that we meet on the streets.

The few criterias are all taken from 1 Corinthians 13.
Love is.. (marks i give myself upon ten to see where i am)
patient (2)
kind (7)
not jealous (2)
not boastful/proud (6)
not rude (6)
does not demand its own way (9)
not irritable (9)
keeps no record of wrong (5)
rejoices with the truth (9)
never gives up (4)
always hopeful. (7)

wow. seems like i'm so not perfect. i realised just how dumb i've been living my life for so many years. i look back and remember the countless times i screamed at my parents for "not understanding" me, times where i have looked down on others, times when i did not give the respect and always thinking i'm so great, times when i seemed impatient with so many things and people, especially her. and yes. i've hurt people who i thought i loved. so many, i can't keep record of them anymore.

you know, when the speaker came and said all these, i looked at myself thinking how dumb i've been the whole past month. yea, i said i didnt want us to be tgt and that i respect you, yet i let myself be influenced and pressured you to get closer when i knw i shouldnt. yea, i may have pressured you to "get tgt" with me in many ways i thought i didnt. i just craved for you to feel the same way i feel towards you. but i guess i went way overboard, till it's nt as comfortable as it should be. i guess i'm not perfect. and if i lose you, i could say i deserve it.

i also want my parents to know that, well, though i've been the worst son i could be, creating trouble, not helping out, always blaming you and not respecting you as parents to make the best decisions for me. yea, i'm wrong. i've always beem jealous of sis's results, and her ability to do way better than me affects me alot, though i always try to hide it. comparing aint that fun, and yea, i knw you want the best for me, for my life. so i have failed you so far.

lastly, it's you oh Lord who i wanna apologize. i knw you've been there for me my whole life, probably why i've put you for granted for so long. i failed you in so many ways, and the implications of my actions may have been destructive. i always hoped to serve you well, but i guess i lack the fundamentals. yea, i knw the verses, knw the songs, serve in the main band and many look up to me, but i havent really put that to good use. i keep judging others, creating a whole "characteristic" of one without knwing them. and i knw i've done wrong. i may have the talent, the skill given from you. but if my heart is not set right before you, i am wrong, WAY WRONG. and so Lord, thanks for forgiving me. i knw you have, and you always will, cos yr love is perfect. yr grace is sufficient. and i knw ive taken it for granted time and again, but Lord this time i'll try my best to make it right before you.

=DD i love you Jesus, deep dwn in my heart.

Hosanna, You are holy and exalted
Hosaana, You are high and lifted up
Hosanna, you are worthy of all praise
We worship You, We worship You.

How great You are, How great You are
You are the mighty King,
And You've come to reign in me
How great You are, How great You are
I give you all the praises of my heart.

yea. after service was worship prac. i rehearsed with the singers for the first time and again, bro keith asked me if i wanted to support sing. hmmm, Lord, give me an answer?

OHYA! i didnt knw i was more of a tenor than alto. HAHAHAHA. all these while i got mixed up. and yea, singing parts is sooooo not easy LAH. hahahas. i si need training. HAHA (:

2008-03-14T23:19:00.001+08:00

guess it's nt the same anymore, huh?

-shrugs.

LT! jiayou for yr exams huh. (::::::: HAHAHA.

=D

tmrw's ccc exco outing to sentosa. gtta wake up early.

ahwells.

fatin!

2008-03-10T01:12:00.002+08:00

FATIN!
my sayang..

dont be upset k? smileeeee for me. =DDDDDDD

someone better will come! dont worry. he's an ass!
HAHAHA. yre way better. so cheeeeer up k?

seeeee? i dedicated a post to you, so be proud!
HAHAHA. go slp early alright? =D

2008-03-07T23:14:00.001+08:00

yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
haha maybe becos u're the most charming and sexiest guy from srjc..
yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
thats why God made you so beautiful
yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
and touched so many people hearts..
yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
and made so many ppl's day...
yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
in fact ure my favourite boy from srjc..and im serious..
yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
beocs u really made me smile.
yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
and told me to cheer up when im at the lowest pt of my life..
yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
thats the difference between u and them..
yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
u made me smile..during the darkest days of my life..
yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
the rest just didnt really bother.
yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
thats the biggest diff between u and them
yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
simple yet great.
yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
simple yet great.
yhihhuua needs to mug more. says:
simple yet great.

AWWWWWWWW! =DDDD
that made my day! =)

yhihhuua finally spoke the truth! HAHAHAHA. =P

OHOH! i scored E for chinese. THANKYOU DADDY! =DDD

2008-03-02T21:55:00.001+08:00

HEY EVERYONE!

ALL THE BEST TO THE COMMON TESTS TOMORROW!
JIAYOU EH? =)

GOD BLESS!

darren

2008-03-02T18:44:00.000+08:00

skip ct's!

PLEASEEEEEE!
damien, pls be like me and stop drinking alcohol la, dumbass.. HAHAHA.

i miss you.

2008-02-19T20:45:00.000+08:00

i feel like something has been taken out of me.

argh. it was not supposed to feel this way.

2008-02-09T22:42:00.000+08:00

HELLLOOOOO!

it's been a loooonnnngggg time since i blogged, so yea..

HAHAHA.
i've been rather busy lately, with alot of tests that i had to prepare for, plus the cny preps.

bought alot of stuff, had fun shopping with jonathan, wilson, lyn, sabrina and all la.

am rather tired lately. slept the bulk of yesterday. WOAH. shioookkk! hmmmm bt quite weird leh. Auntie Adeline's maid commented that i looked slpy. guess i've nt recovered all of my sleep yet lah. HAHA. =DDD

ahwells, i'm rather bored at the moment. went auntie adeline and pastor al's hses tday. had so much fun. back to work tmrw tho. YEAP! =DDD

churchhhh! wooots. serving again! hahahas. it's always great to serve the Lord! =D

byeeee and have a great weeeekkk!

i serve only You.

2008-01-27T21:01:00.000+08:00

to keep Your lovely face
ever before my eyes
this is my prayer
make it my one desire
that in my secret heart
no other love competes
no rival throne survives
and i serve only You.

yes oh Lord.
no rival throne survives, and i serve only YOU!
=DDDD

thank you Lord.

Jesus, lover of my soul
Jesus, i will never let You go
You've taken me from the miry clay
and set my feet upon the rock
and now i know
i love You
i need You
though my world may fall
i will nvr let You go
my Saviour, my closest friend
i will worship You till the very end.

today's sermon touched on alot of things, such as the name of the Lord; El Shaddai.

His name is soo great, and it has so much meaning in it. He is not jus a father to us, bt a "MOTHER" as well. that when His children are hurt, tired and weary, He is like a mother hen, who will comfort us under his wing, like a mother who's child stops crying once he or she hears the heartbeat from her chest. That's the God we serve. AMEN. =)))

tho times have been tough and my weekends are so dedicated to church that i had better start focusing on my studies as well, i believe the Lord sees the heart and will bless those who puts his whole heart into serving Him.

at course 301, i also learnt from pastor huang the many gifts God has given to us, such as the gift of healing, music and even compassion. and i thank God for His patience, that He gives us gifts and talents that He will not take from us, even when we turn from Him, but his patience is ever so high. THANKYOU DADDY! =DDDD

i will serve You, till the very end. no matter what!

the 101st

2008-01-20T22:26:00.000+08:00

and since this is the hundred-and-first post,
let's congratulate darren lee for his one-hundredth post below this! (:

haha. rubbish kid la.

i want sundays to last forever.
can't do that, so let it be sunday everyday ((:

for You, Lord!

quite scared, i dont know why. but i just am. even though i'm not supposed to be feeling anything.. sorry?

i guess here's where You are gna appear beside me, to lead me, to guide me.
-RUNS towards!

2008-01-19T11:08:00.000+08:00

hello everyone! it's back to me, darren lee, the owner of this blog!

HAHAHA. the recent two updates were written by guess who! HAHAHA. and there she is:
she's been updating for me, the lazy pig.

TIRED WEEEEK!

will elaborate soon, if i have the time!

now.. let me dig up my old refresh booklet and search for smth. CYA ALL SOOOON!

i will, if it ever happens. but till nw, you have the keys to my heart! <3 =DD

men as the accused, mother nature being prosecutor.

2008-01-17T21:23:00.000+08:00

okay i had my class's court case today sooo.. yeah!
HA. it was so fiercely done.
verdict yet to be set, can't wait for it to be, heh (:

anyway. owner of blog's being really irresponsible to leave me to blog here.
i'm not even touching my own!
say, aww.

on a random note,
i will miss sunflower.
though we do not talk much, nor known for long, still i will miss seeing you around!
and ruffling your hair.
POUTS ):

come back and take over, darren lee /:
you lazy idiot you.

tell me if one day it all wears off, okay?

the friendly invasion!

2008-01-15T22:33:00.000+08:00

not a martian nor an ant!
thus thou shalt not fear (:
where onions rule the land,
and enslaved are the bears.

HA.

guess who! ((:

for guess who.

2008-01-13T22:41:00.000+08:00

argh. the week's been really long and i'm just hating life as a JC2 student. now i can see why everyone was sooo stressed in JC2. plus it's like only the last two weeks LAH!

hahahas.

anyways, fri was a meaningful day at heartware. we were attending the final meeting and closing up the loose ends. we discussed about things such as how the event can be improved and so on and so forth. we also did a time of sharing, such as what things we saw in people, what they improved on and what they need to improve on. and mine is... TO BE MORE SERIOUS AT TIMES WHEN NEED BE. heh, k i shall be mr serious-when-needed!

heh, sat was a good time back in SAS. met up with tim and the rest, and tho i see a huge change in sfc, the change in SA isn't all that good tho. haiz. the infrastructure's also nt taken care of etc.

HAHAHA. yeap and cell was great. sabrina did an amazing job on HEROES. hahahas.

SUNDAY! went to church with pastor al preaching. learnt alot from his message. i love this quote he mentioned during service.

"To be forgiven is such sweetness that honey is tasteless in comparison. But yet there is one thing sweeter still, and that is to forgive."
C.H. Spurgeon

It's definately great to forgive others and for others to do the same, bt yet so many times, it is really difficult. this message touched my heart, and i learned to be obedient to him. AMEN. =D

LALALALALALA.
there GUESS WHO. this is for youuuu. HAHAHA.

2008-01-10T23:07:00.001+08:00

LALALALALLA.
dearie, when you see this, SMILE! (((((:
SMILEEEEEE!

cos i like you just the way you are!

cos i love you. <33!

2008-01-02T23:11:00.000+08:00

ahh...

first day of school was quite alright, though i had a stupid migrane from the start of school till i went home to slp. HAHA. hmmmm i have an extremely sweet new CT. she rocks man. Mdm Karen Tan. plus shes the gp tutor! YAY. hahahas. shes real nice and i forsee some of us, including me, might take advantage of her. HAHA, but Lord help me not to! hahahas.

hmmm had ccc after that, was quite alright la, running up and dwn. bt wells, gt the stupid vid to complete by fri, i guess its a late night tmrw!

heh, sr's first orientation, i heard, is a total failure. hope the students will still stay, really. sr isnt that bad after all. =D

im beginning to feel at home here. love the ppl and the environment. love ccc too.

HAHAHA. heartware's over. THANKGOD. but nw it's time to focus, and my maths is a total failure. shit. try yr best darren. TRY.

2007-12-23T16:08:00.000+08:00

In these moments, moments of our lives
All the world is ours, and this world is so right
You and I sharing this time together, ohh
Sharing the same dream
As time goes by we will find

These are the special times, times we'll remember
These are the precious times
The tender times, we'll hold in our hearts forever
These are the sweetest times, these times together
And through it all one thing will always be true
The special times are the times I share with you

Mmm oh yeah

With each moment, moment passing by
We'll make memories that will last our lives
As you and I travel through time together, ooh ooh yeah
Living this sweet dream
And every day we can say

These are the special times, times we'll remember
These are the precious times
The tender times, we'll hold in our hearts forever
These are the sweetest times, these times together
And through it all one thing will always be true, oh ooh yeah
The special times are the times I share with you

These tender moments, when heaven is so close
These are the moments that I know

These are the special times, times we'll remember
These are the precious times (alright)
The tender times (the tender times)
We'll hold in our hearts forever
(We'll hold in our hearts forever)
These are the sweetest times, these times together
And through it all one thing will always be true
Ohh yeah yeah

The special times are the times I share
The special times are the times we share
The special times are the times I share
With you

just got back from youth leader's retreat at gallery hotel. it was amazing, yet tiring, to do a detailed planning for 2008. With every goal in sight and now settling the bonding part that we did not have thru the launch of refresh! ministries and the refresh! camp, it's time to enter a more spiritual aspect of the youth. we need to pray and seek His direction in every aspect, and see how far He'll take us. i'm sure the journey will be far and fulfilling. =DD

christmas is coming. am playing for christmas service. it's really very difficult and challenging, especially cos we gotta make an impression on our friends for this outreach service. i need His blessing over it all, and on me too.

hmmmm. hope yre enjoying yrself in HK. =DD <3!

2007-12-12T01:36:00.001+08:00

I MISS YOU.

it's gnna be three more days before yre coming back, sweetie, and i miss you alr. you left yesterday la, but i feel odd now. haiz.

hahahas.

I MISS YOU.

2007-12-08T23:49:00.001+08:00

the entire week's been so tired, yet fun. the times spent at the atrium, though was physically draining, was good. i've learnt alot under heartware and being able to learn from the school of hard knocks.

this week's been eventful, i must say.
Sat, went to sentosa for BEACH OUT! though the attendance was horrid, we managed to have fun and all. slept at sentosa and got a tan after that la. HAHAHA. went to atrium after that.

Sun, off to church. worship led. though my prayer's been that the youth will grow and that God will move, the numbers are the same. we really need a time to sit down and pray sincerely with everything we've got, and to have everyone united in one body of Christ and being on fire.

Mon, went to TJ. had alot of fun there. the people there are simply FUN! hahahas. played alot of games with screaming alongside all the time. the people there are SUPER frenly to the max. HAHAHA. after, we went to atriu. EEEE.

Tues to Fri, ATRIUM. HAHAHAHA.

sat, church small group. attendance not really good. haiz. GOD!

yea. that sums up my week.

you were lovely on friday, really. you redefined beauty(in a good way!) =)

2007-12-03T11:01:00.000+08:00

PLEASE COME DOWN TO THE ATRIUM TO HELP US.

hahahas. thankyou.

2007-12-01T22:52:00.000+08:00

confusion, a ruthless mix. it's like seven different colours of the rainbow spilled into one spot. messy, unending mess. that's how i feel.

i think, ponder, wonder.

2007-11-28T01:13:00.001+08:00

My Saviour,
How i long to know You,
More and more each day
Each moment,
Drawing closer to You,
To know Your ways

Lord You are the potter and i am the clay.
Lord i hear You calling and i will obey
Your word is living water to my thirsty soul
Jesus here i am

Into Your hands,
Lord i lay my desires,
all that i am
Jesus take me,
Lord remake me,
i will live for the glory of your name.

thankyou Daddy, for letting me put my eternal trust into your arms, knowing always that you will be there always. Lord, let yr plan be done.

2007-11-26T22:31:00.000+08:00

The rain, just never seems to bring
The joy, I feel the same
Everlasting pain of my loss remains

My heart, can't seem to learn to part
The hold you left your mark
All that I dreamed of now it seems so stark

Though I told myself don't hold my breath
A part of me was dying
There is nothing left for me to do now, but give in

If you gave me, one chance to tell you how i was feeling
I would sing to you and tell you I won't live my life without you
If you gave me, one chance to tell you how i was feeling
I would hold your hand and look in your eyes and you know,
l'd never let you go

The way, you left me on the train
I don't know what to say
I remember everything on that day

I can't believe we'd never dance
I just need one more chance
to share the sunset
our last romance

Tho I told myself don't hold my breath
a part of me was dying
there is nothing left for me to do now, but give in

If you gave me, one chance to tell you how i was feeling
I would sing to you and tell you I won't live my life without you
If you gave me, one chance to tell you how i was feeling
I would hold your hand and look in your eyes and you know,
l'd never let you go

2007-11-22T23:31:00.000+08:00

Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get, it's what you are expected to give - which is everything.

this is so true. that's why i give everything, knowing that you can receive nothing.

and i found this quote:

Love the heart that hurts you, but never hurt the heart that loves you.
Vipin Sharma

when i read it, i felt it needed a change. it should be this:
love the heart that you love, but never hurt the heart of the one you love.

that's what i believe in, ever since i was young. and till now, i still believe this is true. =)

2007-11-21T23:34:00.000+08:00

there's nothing more that i can say, but it is you that i love. everything that i do, i don't mind the work, the stress and everything.

there's alot of things going through inside my mind, but all i want is to be by your side, to see you smile and to support you. even though i nvr say it anymore, it doesnt mean my love for you has faded, bt it is just that i do not want to put you in the uncomfortable situation.

i really love you so much. honestly.

2007-11-18T00:10:00.000+08:00

i am tired, so tired that it becomes inexplainable.

RAHHHH.

get a life, darren.

tday's bbq was quite fun la, tho being sick didn't exactly help much, but ohwells....

HAHA, met up w yuesheng, edmund and the rest of them. talked cock as usual as we try our very best to reach out to them. the food was exceptionally GOOOOODDDDD, considering that i was at the place where i grew fat when i was younger - AUNTIE GERALDINE!

when i was young, she and auntie esther kept feeding me whenever i went over to their places la. HAHA, bt luckily i look much nicer nw. PHEW.

hmmmm played bball, and as usual joachim, with his big body, totally owned everyone under the board. Grabbing rebounds and shooting in lay-ups are his forte. NYJC number 10. HAHAHAHA.

anyways, am damn tired alr. the stupid heartware thing is killing me. RAHHHH. inexperienced, yes we are. but im sure we'll succeed! JIAYOU EXCOs! =DDDD

2007-11-15T20:36:00.000+08:00

as the year draws to a close, i looked back into this year.

Highlights:

this year, i came to sr as a relative unknown, made many friends during first orientation and first three months. the class chose to stay together as one, and i became an OGL for Argo 5. Made another new batch of frens, was posted into S14 and joined ccc. Made a large number of friends there, friends who brought alot of joy into my life, something that was needed in spite of the normal lessons.

and then i met you. life has never been the same again. as i see you smile, i smile. when youre sad, im sad too. and yes, you bring sooo much joy into my life.

Although i came into sr not knowing what to expect, and having been in a all-male school all my life, habits had to change. but here, i met many friends, genuine friends. and i wanna thank you all for that.

as this year draws to a close, i realised that certainly when God told me that this route would be tough yet fun, i never regretted this path. and now i know why you placed me into sr, Lord. thanks so much.

yes, sr may be a school that no one ever thinks of joining, and is the last jc of the entire colleges. but here is not a path for the faint hearted, and here is where joy can take place, as long as you dont look down on the school and hate it. the principal is great, and tho i somehow dont like the way it is being run, but so what? as the principal said, we can strive and work hard to achieve better and greater heights.

dont ever let anyone put you down, for if you set your heart to it, you will make it. =D

2007-11-14T23:41:00.000+08:00

went heartware tday with some of them. met huilin, and found out there is ALOT of shit to do. ARGH.

TIME TO START WORK!

=(

i feel like slapping alvin nw. HONESTLY.

2007-11-13T14:56:00.000+08:00

tired, yes i am. nw nursing a headache. using daddy's tablet pc, so funnnn. =DD

hmmmm tday had exco meeting, and as usual, we're slacking as much as we can. charlotte and shirlene gt into a christmas mood with some songs.

FELIZ NAVIDAD! =DDDDDD my favourite song for christmas.

nw i gt myself a new POSB GO! card. now i can sign instead of swipe. HAHA.
shall end here. =)

2007-11-12T00:49:00.000+08:00

pain, ache and sadness. the feeling sucks. i wish to ease them, honestly. i'll try, no matter how hard it is. that, i will assure you.

punching bag, listener, even being a joke, i am willing. that is how far i will go just to see that smile on yr face. =)

How Excellent Your Name!

2007-11-11T21:40:00.000+08:00

Oh Lord our God
How excellent Your name is
How excellent Your name in all the earth
Your glory fills the heavens
Beyond the furthest star
How excellent Your name in all the earth

When i think about the heavens
the moon and all the stars
i wonder what You ever saw in me
but You took me and You loved me
and You given me a crown
and now i praise Your name eternally

heard this song in church tday. was super touched by it. i first heard this song in Junior School, when we had chapel every thursday(i think) and pastor daniel would sing this for us once in a while. i used to like it alot, tho at that time the song did not mean anything to me. But when i heard it again in service, i started tearing. all the memories of my past came back to me. the part when i think about the heavens, the moon and all the stars, i wonder what You ever saw in me, i just thanked Him for this 17 years of my life. The times where i was naughty, disobedient, defiant and all. THANKYOU DADDY!

2007-11-09T22:11:00.000+08:00

i'm bored. B-O-R-E-D.

my class having bbq tmrw. when can they not dislike me sia. haiz.

og outing cancelled. haiz.

misses you sooooo.

2007-11-08T22:29:00.000+08:00

THANKYOU EVERYONE! love you all.

i lazy to add the names of ppl who wish me. TOO MANY!
im feeling the love!

HAHA.

anyways, thankyou for yr pressies! gt a topman card w 100 inside and a teddybear by the name of TEDDY LEE! LOLS. THANKYOU! so sweet all of you.

HAD A MEMORABLE DAY! and....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LITING!
it's been so long since ive knwn you. HAHA. cant count alr. HAHA!
YOUTHLEADER! =D tho youre nw in adult ministry, will still appreciate all the yrs you were there when i was in sec one and two. =D

and to johnny and eelin, thanks for the birthday treat. it's been great working with you. AND YES! we gt the hint. EVAN'S BIRTHDAY COMING MUST BUILD A BEAR! HAHA. =DDD

EVAN! <3

2007-11-07T11:03:00.000+08:00

THANKYOU everyone for yr well wishes!

1.Charlotte
2.Yhihhuua
3.Leslie
4.Clarence
5.Elisha
6.Aunt Phyllis
7.Shirlene
8.Aaron
9.Jean
10.Melissa
11.Timothy Er
12.Jane Tan
13.Fengli
14.Mother
15.Damien
16.Yingwen
17.Jie
18.Nariah
19.Jeriel

and counting!

Congrats Miss First Caller! and to all the rest, THANKYOU! you really made my day.

<33333333 all of you. =DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

and lastly, THANKYOU Daddy for all you have given me, watching over me from heaven as i live my life on earth. Love You to the max!

<3333333333333

2007-11-05T17:20:00.000+08:00

BORING DAY AT HOME!
=/

it's time to go out! msg me if you miss me! =)))))

i love you.

CAMP REFRESH 2007

2007-11-05T11:39:00.000+08:00

CAMP REFRESH 2007!

our poster. design by joel lyn. =D aka camp commandant!

SHIRTS FOR CAMP REFRESH! design by joel lyn too! HAHA. thanks dude. you rock.

join us at camp refresh from 14-17 dec 07. worked really hard on it. venue: katong hostel. cya there! =D

REFRESH ministries was just introduced this year and was worked upon by a few of us youths. the main purpose is to change the mindsets of people that the youth are certainly very capable people too, and to help relaunch the youth with a new identity and purpose. prayed about it and came up with this name, as we certainly want to start anew, thats why we decided on REFRESH!

the refresh ministries was launched last week by our camp commandant joel lyn and with its new logo and teeshirts. maranatha youth is now known as REFRESH MINISTRIES!

THANKYOU everyone for being a part of us. =D

Giving from the Heart @ the Atrium

2007-11-03T19:37:00.001+08:00

had to wake up extremely early tday to go for a meeting held at J8 with the Heartware people. the meeting, i had to say, was meaningful and interesting. The head of heartware talked to us for a while and we discussed some stuff la. overall a meeting that was alright. HAHA.

went to eat at LJS. was quite funny cos chun yuan didn't seem interested in talking much until we went on the talk about chemistry and physics practicals. he suddenly seemed ULTRA excited and started blabbering abt his experiences. was kinda cute la he. hmmm after lunch walked around J8 with charlotte and shirlene. saw nariah, fadilah and azirah at FOX. hmmmm. after that was off to church.

there wasn't any printing la tday. SO DUMB, went down there and fell asleep on the sofa while joel and keith were practicing. played the drums for a while, and it felt again like home. HAHA. after that, went for a short snack cum dinner with lyn at zhicha before going home.

am now extremely sleepy. RAHHHH. it's quite funny to think that ive been to town 3 times this week alr. MADNESS. gnna get a woofer and new speakers from creative sooooon. =DDD

2007-10-31T21:21:00.001+08:00

if there is any doubt that i don't, i do love you. I DO. :))))

smile, cause i'll be there for you. i will!

2007-10-31T19:55:00.001+08:00

2007-10-29T21:09:00.000+08:00

just got news.

DAD WILL BE AWAY ON MY BIRTHDAY, AGAIN.

how i just wish he could choose to stay in singapore and be FREE on my birthday. haiz. after being overseas like more than half the time this year, i was hoping at least he'll be here, but that's his calling la. mother told me about it. haiz. oh wells, i love him too much to be angry, but it's been like 3 yrs since he was here during that day.

it takes nothing to be a father, but much more to be a DAD

over and done with!

2007-10-29T20:34:00.000+08:00

CHINESE is WAY OVER!
OVER AND DONE WITH, yes it is.

WHEEEEEE.
now it is time for OP. -pouts

dumb chinese has been completed.
went out with roy and kian hong. walked around orchard for like 4 hours? hmmmm. was nice to catch up with kian hong. CANT WAIT FOR DEC! shopppppiiiinnnnnggggg. =DDDDD

anyone wanna go shopping with me? =P

2007-10-27T22:27:00.001+08:00

woah. was super tired last night that i kinda konked out and fell asleep from 745-1015 and then 12-1015 this morning. WOAH, and i was still tired. =P

went to church to do our shirts for refresh! ministry that is gnna be launched tmrw! WHEEEE.
God pls bless our ministry as we grow and learn in Christ.

am like super tired nw la. spent like 5 hrs doing the shirts. next week again, bt overall it was a good experience and i did my shirt. YES! the trouble. =DD

well, that is all i have for you. nights. =)

2007-10-27T01:09:00.000+08:00

there can be miracles
when you believe

COMMENDATION DAY!
the sights of seeing frens going up and a speech by principal wasnt smth to look much forward to, but ohwells, at least the talk was meaningful. =D

waited in school for the longest time, before clarence ended his guitar ensemble meeting and damien finish his op rehearsal.

your smile takes my breathe away.

GNIGHT. off to bed again.

2007-10-25T00:04:00.000+08:00

the teachers are like milo tins
we are like the milk sweeteners. hmmmm. WEIRD.

yhihhuua was like SOK KOON is the sweetener. HAHA.

went cafe. was gnna ask more ppl along, but guess what? when ccc ended, poof, all gone. HAIZ.

i've got destiny and purpose
i've got everything i need
cos his love is everlasting
and his spirit sets me free
ive got joy that lasts forever
and a peace you can't conceive.
JESUS
he lives inside of me.

=DDDDDDDDDDDDD

2007-10-23T21:46:00.000+08:00

stressful week i guess. HONESTLY STRESSFUL WEEK.
finally, a reprieve tmrw when all the other groups have to do their OPs. it's like OP is on next wednesday, and after that, the difficult point is OVER. haiz. i jus wish it comes soon. =D

ccc tmrw again, but only some short teeny weeny briefing. hmmm, anyone wnna go out tmrw after that DUMB briefing? hmmmm. let's see la.

it's gnna be an ultra early night i guess. i'm so damn shagged alr. well, at least i'm gnna have another year of this. but it's a choice and so i must strive on! i must. =))))

i didn't mean to fall

2007-10-21T22:22:00.000+08:00

"A Lonely September"

I'm sittin' here all by myself
just tryin' to think of something to do
Tryin' to think of something, anything
just to keep me from thinking of you
But you know it's not working out
'cause you're all that's on my mind
One thought of you is all it takes
to leave the rest of the world behind

[Chorus]
Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did

I'm sittin' here tryin' to convince myself
that you're not the one for me
But the more I think, the less I believe it
and the more I want you here with me
You know the holidays are coming up
I don't want to spend them alone
Memories of Christmas time with you
will just kill me if I'm on my own

[Chorus]
Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back

I know it's not the smartest thing to do
we just can't seem to get it right
But what I wouldn't give to have one more chance tonight
One more chance tonight

I'm sittin' here tryin' to entertain myself with this old guitar
But with all my inspiration gone it's not getting me very far
I look around my room and everything I see reminds me of you
Oh please, baby won't you take my hand
we've got nothing left to prove

[Chorus]
Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did

And I didn't mean to meet you then
we were just kids
And I didn't mean to give you chills
the way that I kiss
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back but I know you did
Don't say you didn't love me back 'cause you know you did
No, you didn't mean to love me back
But you did

thanks yhihhuua and hweeyee for the dinner. enjoyed it, throughly. and i'm honest. =DD

had a fun time jamming this afternoon at church. practiced this one song that's fast and upbeat. bt i forgot the song alr. HAHA. it's jus a great honour and blessing to serve Him, right?

PW lessons for the next few days. HAIZ, and chinese too. honestly, i hope to pass it. HAHA.

2007-10-20T12:44:00.000+08:00

having the peace of God is something that i always wanted, but have never seemed to hold on to it for long. there were times when i could communicate with Him so easily, but now i feel like i'm just not giving him enough time everyday. i must pray more for my frens, cause honestly after the holidays begin, there wont be much opportunity to share the truth of God.

this week has been rather chaotic. so many submissions, so much work to be done. phew. at least the first OP went rather smoothly, though i kinda screwed up here and there. God, help me to do well for it. I need yr grace. =D

MORE EYE CONTACT WITH AUDIENCE PLEASE! HAHA. IT'S TIME TO OWN THE LAST LAP OF PW.
oh Lord, help me pass this chinese A level paper. EVEN A SUB-PASS IS GOOD ENOUGH. i cant make it for chinese at all la. it's my WEAKEST. heh. help meeeeeeee!

btw, it's glad to see that you enjoyed the honey i made. =D glad that you're well, and SMILING AGAIN!

2007-10-18T00:05:00.000+08:00

yhihhuua, dont cry anymore. things happen cause they were made to happen, and sometimes we cannot have any say in what happens, and that is life. we cannot decide what we get in life, and if we could everyone would choose joy, peace and happiness. but God planned our lives so much so that everything is done for a purpose.

i knw yr mother's rather horrid to you. to think she did not even remember your birthday is harsh enough. but it could be possible that she remembered, but just could not bare to say it to you. or maybe the world has been too harsh for her and she cannot release the anger on anyone but you. i knw the feelings suck, and yes, yr mother's love for you before was amazing. i cant imagine if my mother turned mad one day because the love she gives me is also very much, but honestly from the bottom of my heart, all i can say is although you cant change it, there are people around you who care. so many. to name a few, leslie, clarence, charlotte, bryan, damien, teressa, etc. SO MANY! go look for us, im sure we'll offer a listening ear and a hug. dont worry, k?

pray to Jesus, cos he can help you. HONESTLY.

I'M SO SORRY!

2007-10-17T01:08:00.000+08:00

hey
sorry for what i said, honestly, i didnt mean it la, just wanted to tell you to sleep well and have the beauty sleep.
it was my fault, said the wrong thing. should be more sensitive to girls laaa, but what you said cannot be proven wrong too. so yea, please forgive me k?

STUPID DUMB ME.

youre EXTREMELY beautiful to me and i honestly dont really care abt looks, but what is inside. and what is see is beauty, ultimate beauty. please forgive me. i feel so dumb bad la. OHMAN. God, help me to be more sensitive.

-pouts.

2007-10-16T00:32:00.000+08:00

is running away the best possible way?
i keep thinking, bt then it aint right to do so.
ohwells, guess i'm jus plain blur la huh.
GOD I NEED YOU!
how come it seems like when i have problems then i would turn to you? WHY?
honestly, help me nt to fall into that again oh Lord. this is my prayer.

2007-10-13T11:38:00.000+08:00

last night was quite a wonderful time spent with roy. it's been so long since ive met him and so long since we went out to queensway and ikea, smth we used to do very commonly during SAS days. ohwells, ate those lovely swedish meatballs again, like we always do, and walked ard queensway countless times. sat down and chatted with him, and he told me abt his life in SAJC and this wheeyouweet girl, cindy. HAHA, cindy's gnna meet him ltr tday, lucky boy. bought a man utd waterbottle for charl and then went home like ard 1030 la.

now to the bus part.
OMG, the bus was filled with like SO MANY CHINAMEN. they all boarded at bugis and they were talking very loudly. i was sandwiched in btw two of them and they kept on talking la. even when i was listening to almost max volume on my iPod i could still hear them.

Journey home from queensway was extremely long, ard 55 min, due to the jam along geylang road. it started ard kallang that side, so you could guess hw bad it was. it was due to the hari raya celebrations along malay village there la, and the bus was like SUPER FULL! haiz, oh wells, reached home and slept early last night - 1230!

oh yar, i read this article on the shooting in Ohio and it kinda pains me to see them doing such things there. it is like 26 cameras didnt catch him and the metal detectors were not even on. WHY INSTALL THEM IN THE FIRST PLACE, i wonder. hmmm, and it is like the guy's probably demonic or smth, cause i read that he worships marilyn manson, the "reverend" of the church of satan. God, help this world, which is like being destroyed by these type of ppl. OHMAN. HAIZ.

2 Timothy 3:1-4: (KJV) "This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God."

Luke 17: 26-30: "And as it was in the days of Noah, so shall it be also in the days of the Son of man. They did eat, they drank, they married wives, they were given in marriage, until the day that Noah entered into the ark, and the flood came, and destroyed them all. Likewise also as it was in the days of Lot; they did eat, they drank, they bought, they sold, they planted, they builded; But the same day that Lot went out of Sodom it rained fire and brimstone from heaven, and destroyed them all. Even thus shall it be in the day when the Son of man is revealed."

Let's be aware that the time of His return is near. Amen.

check this out when free:
http://www.bible.com/bibleanswers_result.php?id=217

2007-10-10T20:21:00.000+08:00

it's maths tmrw, bt i dont feel it. haiz. i jus hope i can score well.

by God's grace, yhihhuua. HAHA.

LET'S DO THIS GUYS. WE CAN DO IT! GOD BLESS =)))))

wooooooot!

2007-10-09T19:56:00.000+08:00

hello everyone.

it's been a rather good and bad day for me. i really wonder leh, whether a chance to redo this maths exam is actually good or bad for me. haiz i wonder la, if it is good then wheeyouweet to me! at least i have another chance to OWN an exam. HAHA, bt oh wells, im rather careless and im not too sure with some concepts. a little bit of reading thru will really help though. bt im rather lazy to do another paper. i mean it is like im in such a holiday mood alr, hw to pick up? hmmm. =/

HELLO TO YOU! =D din get a chance to say hi in school tday, so here it is!

SMILE PEOPLE, CAUSE WE SERVE A GOOD GOD!
oh btw, yhihhuua, yr hair rocks la, (im a poor liar) it makes you look errrrr, INDESCRIBABLE. =P HAHA. k nw it's time to go meet leslie at east coast park to study. i have to cab home laaaa, oh wells, i really need to study though. msg me if yr bored? THANKYOU PEOPLE!

2007-10-07T22:59:00.001+08:00

Till the End!

All these precious moments
with you by my side
Must be a gift from heaven
That's holding me all night
i dont know how i found you
i'm thankful that i have
now that i have a love so true
to hold, to keep, to share

All my friends around me say
You'll be gone too soon
In the end im gonna make them see
we'd found our way back home

in my heart,
i can no longer hold inside
all of the love i used to hide
i'll always be with you until the very end
in this world,
there is no place i'd rather be
you are my life, my soul, my girl
and through it all i know you'll come to see
that you're the one,
till the end.

anyways, tday was quite an EVENTFUL day. ohwells, sundays are always eventful huh? YAY!
spent alot of time in church, and songlead for youth service too. was not nervous at all even though it's my first time, but not too bad lar. anyways, we went toa payoh lor 8 for lunch and then some came over to have a chit-chat session at my place.

went over to grannys for dinner, saw my baby cuz JOEY! so cute i tell you, jus a little tiny laaaa. scary. =D oh wells, then we went IKEA! bought back a WHOLE lot of rubbish and now my room is a little nicer to see than before. YAY!

the thing that made my day was that my dad told me the board at church is rather impressed with me! and ive been earmarked to be a future leader. OHMAN! God, please guide me! dont let me move away from You, EVER! for nw i hav an option to sit in for board meetings. crap, should i? it's like 4 hours long. HAHA, we'll see. =)